Bonnie Chapman once had a simple joy in celebrating the holidays, but after the tragic loss of her mom, Beth Chapman, in 2019 due to throat cancer, her holiday experiences took a bittersweet turn. In a recent interview with E! News, the 25-year-old reality star opened up about the challenges of ringing in the winter holiday season without her beloved mother.

Honoring Her Mother

Bonnie explained that celebrating Christmas without Beth, who was married to her father, Duane “Dog the Bounty Hunter” Chapman, for 13 years, is a complex emotion. “Because it’s Christmastime, but it’s Christmastime without someone who was a monumental part of my life,” she said. “So trying to find little happinesses here and there while dealing with that, it’s a balance.”She noted that while it’s difficult to manage these feelings, being honest with her emotions is the best approach. “I think being honest with your emotions is the best thing to do,” she said. “If you just stuff them away, they’re just going to stockpile and you don’t want to be that person that keeps everything inside because it’s detrimental to you. I’d rather wear my heart on my sleeve than keep it guarded and have it piled up with so many emotions that have been sitting there and brewing under the surface.”Bonnie recalled that Christmas was a special time in her household when she was growing up. Her mom made her and her siblings “feel so loved because she remembered everything we said we wanted throughout the years.”

Remembering Beth

Now, Bonnie honors her late mother by “never really letting myself forget and always reminding people who she was.” She continued, “I don’t think I’ll ever shut up about her because she was my mom, she was the woman who gave me life. And the very least I can do is remember her and the memories that she’s brought into this world.”A few months after Beth’s death, Duane, 72, expressed his concerns in an exclusive interview with PEOPLE. He said some of her kids were “barely making it.” “We don’t know what to do,” he said. “We haven’t read, we weren’t prepared. I lost my mother first, and when my mom passed away, I’m like, ‘I wish dad would have died first, you know, ’cause I love my mommy.’ So I went to them and said, ‘I’m so sorry that I didn’t die first and mom did.’ ”

Dealing with Weight Loss

In November, Bonnie got candid about her recent weight loss while speaking to E! News. She lost 60 pounds in 10 months using Tirzepatide to reach her goal weight of 130 pounds. She mentioned that her relationship with food worsened after she lost her mom and again when her house burned down in April 2023. “I just didn’t feel healthy, I didn’t feel good,” Bonnie recalled. “I used food as a comfort for most of my life and I’ve realized I cannot do that anymore. I need to make healthier changes so that I’m able to be here with the people I love for a longer time.”