The world of facial feminization surgery (FFS) has evolved significantly, offering individuals a range of procedures to counteract the masculinizing effects of testosterone. These surgeries can include jaw contouring, nose reshaping, Adam's Apple reduction, and more. While some transformations are subtle, others can be dramatic. This article delves into one person's journey through FFS, exploring their feelings about altering their appearance and how cinema has influenced their perspective on this life-changing decision.
The author reflects on their early years transitioning, noting that many of the FFS results they encountered were strikingly transformative. Initially, they felt a mix of admiration and envy, but also uncertainty about changing their own face. Over time, as they observed various outcomes and gained access to healthcare through employment, they became clearer about what they wanted for themselves. Despite feeling confident in their choices, the idea of going to sleep with one face and waking up with another still feels surreal.
To process these emotions, the author turned to films with "face" in the title, ranking them based on how enjoyable they would be to watch during recovery. Some movies directly address facial alterations, while others offer a different kind of reflection on identity and transformation. For instance, Eyes Without a Face (1960) explores the psychological impact of facial surgery, which might be too intense for someone recovering from FFS. On the other hand, lighter fare like Bill & Ted Face the Music (2020) provides escapist entertainment, featuring stoner icons Bill and Ted, which could be more comforting.
Movies like Funny Face (1957), starring Fred Astaire and Audrey Hepburn, offer a delightful distraction from post-surgery discomfort. Meanwhile, Ingmar Bergman's Face to Face (1976) offers an extended exploration of emotional breakdowns, a common experience following such surgeries. The author also highlights Saving Face (2004), a lesbian rom-com that serves as a perfect comfort movie for those seeking a feel-good film during recovery.
In conclusion, the author's journey through FFS has been both challenging and rewarding. Cinema has played a significant role in helping them process their emotions and prepare for the changes ahead. Whether it's through escapist entertainment or deep explorations of identity, these films provide a unique lens through which to view the transformative power of FFS. Each movie offers its own insights, making the recovery period not just a time of physical healing, but also of emotional and psychological growth.