Jo Denman and Tessa Parry-Wingfield's lives took a remarkable turn when they were both diagnosed with a rare form of cancer that led to the removal of one eye. This shared experience forged a deep bond between them.

A Tale of Friendship and Adversity After Eye Removal

Similarities in Their Lives

Both Jo Denman and Tessa Parry-Wingfield are 46-year-old mothers with partners named Mark. They live in southwest London and work in marketing and communications. They also have cats and faced the same medical team during their surgeries. Denman is a mom to a 10-year-old son, while Parry-Wingfield has daughters aged 11 and 13. Their lives seemed to parallel each other in countless ways.The coincidence of their diagnoses and subsequent surgeries was astonishing. They were put in touch by a mutual friend, and their paths crossed just a year apart. Parry-Wingfield had undergone her surgery exactly a year prior to their meeting in March.

The Diagnosis and Its Impact

They were both diagnosed with ocular melanoma, a very rare cancer that affects only five out of every million adults. According to the American Academy of Ophthalmology, this cancer develops in the cells that produce pigment and can occur in or around the eye.Denman noticed a red vein in her right eye and felt a bit "spacey" before her diagnosis. Her optician saw a "shadow" and made an appointment at the hospital the following morning. Weeks of tests later, she was told the tumor had filled half her eyeball, and it was best to have her eye removed.Parry-Wingfield had been diagnosed around a year before Denman and described the situation as "scary and fast-moving."

The Emotional Journey

Looking in the mirror after the surgery was a difficult experience for both. Parry-Wingfield questioned herself about vanity and the horror of seeing herself with one eye. She said, "Nothing will recreate your eye. People say, 'You must be so pleased,' but it's more a calm acceptance. It isn't real and doesn't look the same. We've lost half our vision."Denman also shared her feelings, saying, "We aren't skipping through the fields with great joy because a cancer diagnosis is terrifying. But I like our story. It's a story of facing adversity together."Although they feel lucky for their friendship, the process of grieving for their real eyes has been a long one. Parry-Wingfield added, "Nothing stops you grieving for your real eye. This teaches you a big lesson about what's important."Parry-Wingfield first shared her cancer journey with The Times back in July and called it a "gruelling – but also surprisingly enlightening – ordeal" on her LinkedIn page. She hopes to help others going through a middle-aged cancer diagnosis or any age.