In January, Cara Kim found herself in a rather unusual situation. She was mailed a wedding invitation along with a handwritten letter from her ex-boyfriend's fiancée. This was a person she had never met before. The letter, which was presented as an apology, was interpreted by Kim in a way that deeply affected her. It seemed to suggest that she "never mattered" to the groom and was merely a "rebound" or "placeholder" in his life.

Taking the High Road

Kim ultimately chose to ignore the message and did not attend the wedding in May. In a TikTok post on Dec. 18, she shared photo proof of the wedding "Save the Date" and the handwritten letter. She wrote, "Being hard on myself feeling like I didn’t achieve enough this year. What I actually achieved: Received a letter and wedding invite from my ex-boyfriend’s (now) wife saying I never mattered to him (he was my first love ) and chose to ignore it instead of being petty."The letter itself, on the surface, was not nasty but rather apologetic. The bride wrote, "Dear Cara: I had a few extra that I used for prototyping, so I figured I’d send you one with this note. Thank you for keeping Martin company while I was figuring out what it was that I wanted. I’m so sorry you became collateral damage as soon as I did. I apologized to Martin for my indecision causing him so much pain, but I never got the chance to apologize to you. I wish you all the best!" The bride signed the letter with an "xoxo" and added a postscript with her phone number, indicating that a response was not necessary.Kim was confused as to why she was receiving an apology. She felt that the woman was trying to show her that she was just a placeholder or a rebound for Martin. She added that she didn't understand why the woman would think she cared, as they had broken up years ago. "We broke up so long ago. He’s so far removed from my life."Kim graduated from Vanderbilt University in May 2024, as stated on her LinkedIn. Her relationship with Martin began during her freshman year when he was a senior. It was a serious relationship at first, and they went over their previous romantic histories. Martin told her about his best friend in college who ended their relationship and they stopped being best friends. Kim decided not to ask any follow-up questions and dropped the matter.At the end of the 2022 school year, the couple planned a long-distance relationship for three years as Kim was still in school and Martin had graduated and was moving to another city for a new job. However, Martin broke up with her at the beginning of her sophomore year, leaving her heartbroken. He even blocked her on every platform, making it impossible for her to contact him.Not long after the breakup, Martin started dating his former best friend. Kim was upset but had to move on. She didn't think about the relationship until January of her senior year when she received the letter and wedding invitation in the college mailroom. She was expecting a pink keyboard cover but was shocked to see Martin's girlfriend's name on the envelope.The wedding took place on May 26 in Little Rock, Ark., and Kim did not respond to the letter or attend the ceremony. Commenters on TikTok called Martin's wife "insecure" and "insane" for sending the letter and invitation, suggesting that Kim should send her a "Get Well Soon" card. One comment that Kim liked highlighted, "She probably felt like she ‘won’ but did she? She’s still thinking about her husband’s ex."Kim's story is a unique one that shows the unexpected twists and turns that life can bring. It serves as a reminder that even after years have passed, certain events can still have a profound impact.