A 29-year-old woman finds herself in a dilemma as her boyfriend, Jeremy, has not adhered to the timeline they set for getting engaged. They have been together for six years and have discussed this important step. Early on, Jeremy set a timeline of either five years or when he reached 30 years old. However, those milestones passed last year without a proposal. Now, she is under pressure from friends and family who keep asking why. The woman shared that Jeremy wants to pay off debts before buying a ring, but they are both saving and living within their means. She is ready to buy a home, get married, and start a family, while Jeremy is focused on his physical training and hobbies, leaving them stuck in a post-college lifestyle.

A Woman's Frustration as Her Boyfriend Delays the Engagement

Reasons for the Delay

Jeremy's insistence on paying off debts before proposing has caused a rift between him and his girlfriend. While she understands the need to be financially stable, she feels that their priorities don't align. They are both saving, but it seems that Jeremy's focus on other aspects of his life is preventing them from moving forward. The woman wonders if there is something wrong with her or if Jeremy is truly not ready. She constantly compares herself to her friends who are already married and starting families, which only adds to her frustration.

Even though she has tried to reason with Jeremy, her efforts have fallen on deaf ears. He argues that the commitment is already there between them and that he will get to a place where he feels ready. This has left the woman confused and worried about their future. She is not sure if she will say "yes" if Jeremy does propose, as she is tired of waiting and resentful that he has not kept to his timeline.

Columnist Abigail Van Buren's advice to the woman was to take time to reflect on her situation. She warned that trying to force a marriage proposal out of Jeremy because of her friends' success does not guarantee a happy union. The woman was advised to remind Jeremy one last time that marriage is important to her and that he has not kept his word. If Jeremy still refuses to make the commitment, it may be time to move on.

The Impact on the Woman

The woman's frustration has taken a toll on her. She feels stuck in a limbo, waiting for something that may never come. Her friends' success has made her question her own choices and worth. She is constantly wondering if she made the right decision by staying with Jeremy and if there is someone else out there who would be more committed.

This situation has also affected her self-esteem. She doubts herself and wonders if there is something wrong with her that Jeremy is not ready to commit. The pressure from others only adds to her stress, making her feel even more isolated.

As she waits and waits, the woman is torn between holding on to the hope that Jeremy will change his mind and moving on to find someone who will give her the future she desires. It is a difficult decision that weighs heavily on her heart.